1. |
3-5-5 D-A-Y
01:45
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3-5-5 D-A-Y
If you see it, key it
It’s a big truck that is blue
You can’t mistake it
Revving his engine for no reason
I can't take it
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2. |
Crazy Aunt Mary
02:23
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Last week your Aunt came to visit
She was quite a sight, I wish I could have missed it
She asked me to fight, I said no way
Pack up your bags and leave here today
I said to Aunt Mary, “Leave me alone”
Why did you come here? You didn’t even phone
I don’t want you here, they don’t want you here
When you come over we all live in fear
Crazy Aunt Mary, she came over
She had a massive hangover
Why don’t you go, why don’t you go
Crazy Aunt Mary, we hate you so
Remember last Christmas you didn’t get a gift
Crazy Aunt Mary is such a fucking bitch
She wears a hairnet wherever she goes
Fat, old, ugly and has a big nose
Crazy Aunt Mary, she came over
She had a massive hangover
Why don’t you go, why don’t you go
Crazy Aunt Mary, we hate you so
We hate your guts
We all think you’re nuts
We hate your guts
We all think you’re nuts
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3. |
Five Year Plan
01:38
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Planned on drinking myself to death
Either that or an axe in the head
Didn't care about anything or anyone
Slow suicide, partying under the gun
Used to have a five year plan
Got through it with help from McMahon
Didn't want to live past the age of 25
Now 39 can't believe I'm still alive
Desperate phone call late one night
Knife open on my wrist was in sight
Thanks in part to my best friend
My mother still has four children
Used to have a five year plan
Got through it with help from McMahon
Didn't want to live past the age of 25
Now 39 can't believe I'm still alive
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4. |
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Don't waste your money
Do you like it honey?
That's too bad
It's not supposed to be funny
This song isn't worth a quarter
This song isn't worth a quarter
This song isn't worth a quarter
I'm sorry it should be much shorter
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5. |
Man In The Front
01:49
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The man in the front
He looks like a cunt
He's got a stick up his ass
That's him
His pants are up his crack
You'd think he's out of whack
I hate him
That's Jim
Jim is the man in the front
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6. |
Dagger Radio
01:48
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Old school favorites to local bands
Could be new to you, make another fan
Noise to hardcore and everything in between
Give him a few hours and see what we mean
Dagger Radio
Available at FuzzTalkRadio.com
Tell your brothers, your sister and your Mom
Chuck will save your punk rock soul
He is live on Dagger Radio
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7. |
I'm Not Wasted
02:10
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I may be broke but
I'm not wasted
Don't have a girl but
I'm not wasted
Got a broken guitar but
I'm not wasted
Fuck it, I'm kicking ass and
I'm not wasted
Moneys tight, I don't have a lot
No longer a have not
I may never win
Not gonna give in
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8. |
Porcelain Massacre
01:47
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Sometimes it’s hard to remember how drunk you were
Take a look at the toilet for a porcelain massacre
Porcelain massacre, rates how drunk you were
If your actions from the last night are a complete blur
Take a look at the toilet for a porcelain massacre
Porcelain massacre, rates how drunk you were
If there’s a woman in your bed and you don’t know her
Take a look at the toilet for a porcelain massacre
Porcelain massacre, rates how drunk you were
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9. |
Refried Bean Burritos
02:06
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Refried bean burritos
Whoa whoa whoa
Refried bean burritos
I've got to go
Refried bean burritos
Whoa whoa yum
Refried bean burritos
Bathroom, here I come
Taco Johns or Taco Bell
It doesn't matter
Either will do
I like them just as well
Refried bean burritos
Whoa whoa whoa
Refried bean burritos
I've got to go
Refried bean burritos
Whoa whoa yum
Refried bean burritos
Bathroom, here I come
Brown beans, melted cheese
Onions and hot sauce
Just the way I like 'em
They go down with ease
Refried bean burritos
Whoa whoa whoa
Refried bean burritos
I've got to go
Refried bean burritos
Whoa whoa yum
Refried bean burritos
Bathroom, here I come
Getting burritos with you
Was my favorite part of the week
Damn they put beef in mine
Aaaaaahhhhhhh, fuck you!
Refried bean burritos
Whoa whoa whoa
Refried bean burritos
I've got to go
Refried bean burritos
Whoa whoa yum
Refried bean burritos
Bathroom, here I come
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10. |
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Craig, Craig Ferguson, is a punk rocker
Craig, Craig Ferguson, is a punk rocker
With his buddy Geoff, robot by his side
Old schoolers on his show, punk never died
Awkward pause, mouth organ or glittery ball
Look up to his sobriety, hope he never falls
Craig, Craig Ferguson, is a punk rocker
Craig, Craig Ferguson, is a punk rocker
Great comedian, funny as shit
No more drugs or boozing, he won't have it
Was in a band called the Bastards From Hell
He has bounced back from a past from which he fell
Craig, Craig Ferguson, is a punk rocker
Craig, Craig Ferguson, is a punk rocker
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11. |
When I Die
02:59
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No crying no being sad
When I die
No feeling blue no feeling bad
When I die
Live it up don’t feel down
When I die
Happy sunshine no dark cloud
When I die
I want a party
Kegs of beer and 1919
I want a party
Mix the drunk and the clean
I want a party
Kegs of beer and 1919
I want a party
Mix the drunk and the clean
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